A long time ago, I remember trying to start a conversation with a woman who I thought looked kinda cute. It went something like this…

“Hi”

“Hi”

“How are you?”

“I’m good. How are you?”

“Good, good.”

“…”

(Uh-oh, awkward silence! How do I keep the conversation going? What do I say next? Do I make a joke? Should I comment on how she looks? Think, Steve, think!!)

“So, the weather’s pretty nice,” I muttered. (The weather? Really Steve??)

“Yeah,” she replied.

“…”

“Umm, I need to go,” she finally said. “Nice talking to you” she halfheartedly added. Well, crap. It only took me about 30 seconds before I completely ran out of things to say to her.

How do you overcome the obstacle of running out of things to say when talking to women?

Continue reading How to stop running out of things to say when talking to her →

A long time ago, I used to have a crush on a woman that I saw every day on my bus ride home. I wanted to just go up and talk to her but I was always afraid to. Mostly because I had no idea what I was even supposed to talk to her about.

One day I decided to just go for it. I remember it going something like this:

“Hi”, I sputtered nervously.

“Hi,” she replied.

I felt my heart racing at a million miles per hour. Oh jeez, what do I say next?

“Umm…what time is it?” I muttered. Really, Steve? The time?! You couldn’t think of anything better?!?

“It’s 3:25” she replied.

“Oh, ok” I responded.

A few minutes passed. We arrived at her stop. She got up and walked off the bus. Well, crap. I slunk down into my seat, buried my face in my hands, let out a long sigh, and started hoping that nobody witnessed my dismal attempt at talking to her.

What are you supposed to talk about when you’re talking to someone you’re interested in?

Continue reading What are you supposed to talk to her about? →

I’ve been wary of writing about how to tease women for a long time because there are a lot of sleazy ways to do it. Too many dating advice gurus and pickup artists will tell you to “neg” her by giving her a backhanded compliment so that you lower her self-esteem until she decides to go out with you.

Ugh! It grinds my gears that this type of advice even exists.

Ultimately, I decided to write about teasing because it is a valid form of flirting and there is a way to tease women respectfully. And I think it’s about time that someone wrote about how to tease women in a way that is both non-sleazy and respectful.

The most important thing to remember when it comes to teasing is to do it respectfully.

Respectful teasing is: playfully insulting her without intending to hurt her feelings

Respectful teasing is NOT: insulting her with the intention of actually hurting her feelings

Only jerks tease women by belittling her and trying to undermine her self-confidence. Instead, you want to tease her respectfully. Always be conscious of her feelings. A respectful tease involves saying something slightly edgy or irreverent that will catch her off guard, but without making her feel uncomfortable or offended.

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When I first started looking for love, I noticed that one of my friends who I always saw getting dates had the opposite personality as I did. He is very extroverted and he loves to surround himself with people all the time. When he talks to women, he is very aggressive and makes the conversation overtly sexual very quickly.

That’s not me at all. I’m introverted, reserved, and gentle. After watching my friend succeed seemingly all the time while talking to women, I started to become afraid that I would have to change my personality to be more like his if I ever wanted to get a girlfriend.

I tried to behave more like my friend. However, I didn’t achieve any success even though I was basically doing the same things he was. I also started to feel like I was being an actor by going against my own personality.

What was I doing wrong?

Continue reading How to flirt with women as an introvert →

I really used to suck at picking up signals from women. There have been times where my friends would tell me that I’ve missed having a woman flirt or even openly hit on me, saying that it was obvious she was doing so. But I didn’t realize it at the time because to me, it felt like she was just being friendly.

Also, I’ve been told months after the fact that a woman I knew really liked me but I never made a move so she ended up thinking I wasn’t interested. This really surprised me because I had no idea that she was interested in me at all.

Even though the year is 2017 and we’re in the 21^st century, the gender role still holds strong that a lot of women still expect us guys to make the first move. It’s up to us to go talk to her, ask her out, go for the first kiss, and so on.

So, how do you know if she wants you to approach her? Here are a few signs that she might use to show that she is interested in you:

Continue reading How to tell if she’s interested in you →